Creating

Lavender

August 16, 2017

lavender

I thought I’d missed the blooms, but there were still some on my walk last week.

I’m behind in my postings. I know it’s more important to just write anything than to sit and wait for time, ideas, motivation. I keep a copy of Writing Down The Bones on my bedside table. I read Lindsay Crandall’s August Break post. I scroll Instagram waaaaaaay.toooooo.much.

It’s eclipse season. Mercury is retrograde.

Last night was the first time I slept more than 6hrs in over two weeks, so it makes sense that today is a day where I’m able to sit and write. My horoscope implores me to Stay on track and on task, Pisces…This is an impactful moment for doubling down on habits which shore up your physical well-being, promote a energizing dedication to your everyday work, and/or help you gradually chip away at a big project. I don’t feel like I’m chipping away at anything. Work feels overwhelming and siting at the computer all day makes sitting at the computer some more quite torturous. Being on call for jury duty next week feels like the worse timing of all.

The middle part of my back tingles constantly. My left foot has a serious case of metatarsalgia. Walking feels painful. Sitting is uncomfortable. I’m thinking some yoga would be a much better use of my time than even writing.

Events are happening in our country that bring me to tears, that paralyze me with anxiety. It feels stupid to use any energy I have to write about my small pains and frustrations.

But I miss writing. And writing is something that makes me feel whole and better able to serve others. So, here I am, getting a few posts out while H does bedtime routine and I feel hungry for dinner. Have to feed myself in this way first.


For the month of August, I am posting each day using a prompt from The August Break challenge by Susannah Conway. The prompts encourage a “month of paying attention” which goes hand-in-hand with my new moon intention to focus on my creativity. I’m sharing all my photos on Instagram with #jtaugustbreak

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4 Comments

  • Reply Catherine August 16, 2017 at 7:11 pm

    I’m sorry your body is going through so much physical pain right now. If it’s any comfort, the middle part of my back was nearly always tingly after Asher was born. It was very frustrating because I didn’t know why it was happening or if it would ever go away. I felt overwhelmed by all of the ways I felt like my body was falling apart after having a baby. Fortunately, the tingling did go away, although it was gradual and over a two-year period. I truly hope your tingling goes away too.

    • Reply jtao21 August 17, 2017 at 9:24 am

      Thanks for the kind words & good to know it’s something another mama experienced (and that it does eventually go away!) xo

  • Reply Elisa August 17, 2017 at 2:11 pm

    Feeding yourself. Love that concept and your words. We get nutrition and sustenance from many things don’t we, not just food.

    • Reply jtao21 August 21, 2017 at 2:32 pm

      Yes – such a great way to think about it

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