Life is so very up and down. Whatever mood I couldn’t shake a month ago seem to have morphed into another type of blues. I crave sleep, my diet has gone to hell and I am generally feeling too tired or worn out to accomplish much.
I recognize that there’s an intensity to things lately. That I am meant to lay low and swim against the currents, keeping just enough energy to stay put but not exerting so much I tire and drown.
My sister‘s moved in with H and I temporarily. We have an office, not a second bedroom, and in that room she sleeps on an air mattress and keeps her stuff in a suitcase and the closet. The mattress takes up the whole floor. There is hardly any room to walk around. And while I already blogged about my siblings, I’d like to take a post to acknowledge this unique situation we’re in.
After 24+ years of knowing each other, through emotional pains and ridiculous laughter, through inside jokes, boyfriends and our crazy moves around the US, my sister and I are not only in the same city for the first time in 10 years, but the same apartment.
(Is this not mind blowing yet?)
We’ve walked the dog at the beach, tried different coffee places, folded laundry, bought groceries, cooked and cleaned. We’ve slept in and driven around and completed a 1000 piece puzzle. She’s gone out with my friends without me and held her own. She’s interviewed for a job and I’ve left her at home all day for the alone time in my office.
And while I am feeling antsy – that she may not find a job, that we’ll need a different plan, that I can’t get enough alone time – I know this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance to spend this much time with her. So the control freak in me is working to let go of the need for a routine. The introvert in me is seeking what small alone time we can find. The wise one in me asks for time to read or do yoga.
Overall she’s a perfect housemate. She cleans up after herself, cooks for us, and keeps the dog company. Yes, she temps me to have a cocktail or makes food that I wouldn’t normally eat, but I figure, right now, with Mercury Retrograde and our new situation, to say ‘fuck it’. You only live once right?
I am struggling with my own crap right now and it’s extra comforting to have someone so familiar and loving near. And how do you even begin to say no to oatmeal raisin cookies? I mean, really.
For the month of November, I write each day about something I’m grateful for and call it Grateful Season. It’s my way of reviewing the amazing year I’ve had and helps me focus on blogging during the crazy holiday season uptick. Feel free to join me – just make sure you let me know!